Meat, meat, good to eat!

Damn, damn, damn!

-- Florida Evans, Good Times, "The Big Move: Part 1"

Dammit!

World Vegan Day (November 1st) came and went ... and I - we - missed it. Again, DAMN!

So, what do the vegans want for this world? Just this:

Our theme this year is ‘improving the quality and availability of vegan food’ (otherwise known as Vegan Catering for All).

The Vegan Society are [sic] working with large chain restaurants ... and other catering establishments to get more good-quality vegan choices onto menus.

There ain't a whole lot of vegans in the U.S.A. So why would any chain restaurant or catering establishment go all-out with menu items that appeal to almost nobody? When they're not thinking about not eating meat, vegans would do well to read some Econ 101 books.

That said, I know I ate meat on November 1st. But I would've eaten a lot of meat if I'd known it was World Vegan Day. Indeed, I would've gone and got me a dozen pieces of KFC Original Recipe fried chicken (vegans hate KFC, you know), and I would've smeared grease on my chin and cheeks each time I plucked a piece - pun firmly intended - from my bucket o' chicken.

But wait! According to the Vegan Society, November is World Vegan Month. In honor of the "Vegan Month," I'm gonna load-up my late-Granddaddy's .22 this weekend and go squirrel-hunting for the first time since I was in high school. What I'm gonna do with my kill'd squirrels is soak 'em in buttermilk and bake 'em in a pan with white wine, onions, green peppers, garlic, salt and pepper. Then I'm gonna eat 'em, and maybe smear some squirrel-grease on my chin for anti-vegan effect.

That's how I'm gonna be belatedly celebrating World Vegan Day, and celebrating World Vegan Month in the process. What're you gonna do ...?!