Not very Damm good

I was visiting a local international market today when I stumbled across a beer I'd never seen before: Estrella Damm.

Estrella Damm is a Spanish beer. Its packaging says it as a lager, which it is. If you go to Wikipedia, however, you discover that Estrella Damm is a "pilsener." Well, I'm here to tell you that Estrella Damm ain't no damn pilsener. (Hell, the picture on ED's Wiki page shows that it's a lager. So much for relying on Wikipedia for any-damn-thing.)

Estella Damm has a nice, deep color. It doesn't have a deep flavor, though, and that was disappointing. I didn't detect much hoppiness up front, but ED finished very, very bitter. And not a good kind of bitter. It kinda reminded me of Budweiser. Again, not good.

Needless to say, I purchased my first and last six-pack of Estella Damm lager today.

Gyros, Chicago-style

Let's talk about Chicago Style Gyros on Harding Place. I first stumbled across this fine establishment, which is housed in an old Long John Silver restaurant, 'bout 3 years ago. I'm ashamed that it's taken me this long to tell you about the place.

I love me a good gyro. Always have. When I was a kid, the closest thing to ethnic food that I knew was the gyro joint in the food court at Hickory Hollow Mall. I can still remember how out-of-the-ordinary it was to watch a feller slice meat on a grilled pita from a spinning vertical meat-tube. That kinda thing will stick with you, indeed.

I still love me a good gyro. (Friends and family who've been to Nashville's Greek Festival avec moi can attest to such.) And every time I want a good - nay, a great gyro - I head over to Chicago Style Gyros.

I've probably been to Chicago Style Gyros 20 times, and every time I've ordered the same thing: gyro 'n' fries 'n' a drink ($5.49) ...


Chicago Style's gyros come on grilled pitas just bursting with juicy grilled meat -- and lettuce and tomatoes and cucumber sauce, and hot peppers upon request.

Chicago Style's fries are not only, well, fried to order, they are dusted with a spicy seasoning prior to being served. I've tried to figure out what's in that seasoning, but I've come up short at every taste-filled turn. (Oh, well, just means that I need to try and try again ...!)

I don't think I've ever left Chicago Style Gyros without exclaiming - either to myself or to those with whom I've dined - "Damn, that was good!" And I've never, ever left the place hungry. Indeed.

Get thee over to Chicago Style Gyros sooner rather than later. And tell 'em Joltin' Django sent you.

Chicago Style Gyros
346 Harding Place
Nashville, Tennnessee 37211
615.834.8500

"HP" sounds good to me ...

Given that I grilled some cheap steaks for dinner this ev'ning, and given that I drowned each bite of said steaks in HP Sauce, this needs repeatin' ...

If I were to compile a list of my Top Ten Favorite Condiments -- I'm talking about condiments here, not hot sauces -- HP Sauce would surely be in the top five. If you've never had HP Sauce, son, you're missin' out.

A Scottish fellow with whom I used to work, name o' Craig, turned me on to HP Sauce (HP stands for "Houses of Parliament) some six or seven years ago. Craig was eating a turkey sandwich one day, and he was absolutely coating it with a bottle of something that looked like store-brand A1. "What is that?" I asked. "HP Sauce," he replied. (In his quick-talk Scottish brogue "HP Sauce" was one syllable.)

Craig told me how folks in the United Kingdom put HP Sauce on everything: potatoes, chops, steaks, fish, vegetables, and, yes, sammiches. At that point, I just had to try it. He put a big dollop on a Lay's potato chip and handed it to me. As soon as the tangy, sweet , and spicy brown sauce hit my tongue ... let's just say I was immediately hooked. Indeed, it didn't take long before I was pouring HP Sauce on potatoes, chops, steaks, fish, etc.

HP Sauce has a pretty exotic ingredients list: dates, malt vinegar, tamarind extract, sugar, and spices (among others). I'm not a big fan of dates, so it's kind of funny that I enjoy eating something that features dates as a main ingredient. Enjoy it I do, however, and every time I break open a new bottle I can't help but think about Craig the Scotsman and his turkey sandwich.

In Nashville, you can find HP Sauce in the "British section" at your local Publix supermarket.

"It's only natural to combine them ...."

Food and sex. Those are my two passions.
It's only natural to combine them.

-- George Costanza
Seinfeld, "The Blood"

The Hardee's/Carl's Jr. commercial featuring Padma Lakshmi was just bound to get some "sensitive" folks all worked up. Like Los Angeles Times columnist Dan Neil:

The sexualization of fast food takes us down the same path of old cigarette advertising that showed doctors, athletes and cowboys smoking like crazy and living active, aerobically challenging lives; or beer commercials, in which everybody is as sleek as ferrets. These products have definite, measurable health consequences, and it's the job of the advertising's imagery to push these consequences as far offstage as possible.

Neil closes his column with this:

And so you have the impossibly lean and beautiful Lakshmi wolfing down a 1,000-calorie burger. Now that's hard to swallow.

I have a good friend whose wife is a personal trainer. She'll flat-out tell you that she heads to Krystal two or three times a month for a ten-bagger -- that's a sack of 10 "small, square" Krystal burgers for those who've never heard of such. She's 5'7" and, like, 120 lbs and she'd probably have a few bones to pick with Mr. Neil vis-à-vis his "hard to swallow" quip.

So there.

Me so saucy

I recently received an e-mail from a young lady who wanted to know what's my favorite store-bought BBQ sauce. I told her Sauer's, which is available at any Nashville-are Publix supermarket.

While I'm talking about Sauer's BBQ sauce, please to enjoy this classic A Man's Gotta Eat post on the subject from 2007 ... before a feller could easy find the stuff in Music City. To wit:

I usually shy away from BBQ sauces that feature sugar as a major ingredient. Sauer's does list sugar amongst its ingredients; however, Sauer's has enough pepper and spice in its blend to burn away its already muted sweet flavor.

The only grocery store in the world in which I've been able to find Sauer's BBQ sauce is a little food mart in Camden, TN. I cannot drive through Camden - which I do quite often on my way to my aunt's cabin on Kentucky Lake - without stopping to get me a half-dozen bottles of my second-favorite BBQ sauce in the world (click here for my favorite).

Last night, I cooked a small pork roast with new potatoes, onions and peppers. While the meat - which I'd seasoned with a rub of cayenne, garlic salt, and Cavender's Greek Seasoning - was plenty flavorful by itself, it was absolutely mouth-watering when I added a couple o' squirts of Sauer's.

If you spy Sauer's BBQ sauce in a Nashville-area grocery store, drop me a line and tell me where. Joltin' Django will appreciate it.

Yesterday, Mr. Jimmy gave me a big container of his "Camp-Style Beenie Weenies." I heated 'em up and ate 'em tonight, and, Boy Howdy, what a meal ...!

Mr. Jimmy's bean-dish had big sausage chunks and lots o' onions it, and it came in a delicious red sauce. (It looked like ketchup; it tasted (kinda) like ketchup; but, brother, it wasn't ketchup!) Oh, and it had just -- and I mean just -- enough heat to get a feller's tongue tinglin'. (I needed more tongue-tinglin' so I added me some additional hot sauce.)

If Mr. Jimmy wants to be a peach of a feller, perhaps he'll give us his recipe for camp-style beans.

Re: Taste of Russia

After reading Gots to get over there, Mr. Mordecai reports:

Professor Django:

Indeed, I have already visited Taste of Russia with Mrs. Mordecai and Little Miss Mordecai. Alas, I was underwhelmed.

I've visited two Russian cities twice each, and have enjoyed a good bit of Russian eats.š Maybe I set the bar a bit high for Tennessee Russian food. Maybe it's because Kvaternyuk is ÕËÒÁÉÎÅÃ (a Ukrainian). Whatever the reason, I found the pelmeni too thick, with bland meat filling (though the pork was slightly more interesting than the beef... ain't that always the case?), and they were served only with sour cream, whereas mayonnaise, spicy mustard,šor melted butter would have been authentic additions.š And if that hole-in-the-wall in Moscow was the standard, there should have been a ratty-lookin' cat roaming around the place.

The piroshki were dry. The "meat" filling was almost grainy it was so dry, and the crust was baked, where fried would have been better (a real shock, I know). They reminded me of the piroshki I picked up at Aleksey's on Thompson Lane (where, incidentally, I once ran into the lead singer from Bering Strait). But the cabbage filing was pretty good. Sweet. Could have been cooked a tad less, but alright. Mrs. Mordecai ordered potato piroshki, and was more pleased than I was, whatever that's worth to you.

The borsch was good; nothing to criticize.š More beef than you'd find in a genuine Russki place in Russia, but that's a good thing. There are lots of versions of borsch, but the kind I had at Taste of Russia was the only kind I've ever had. Tasty... beetalicious. The brown bread served with the borsch was dead-on. Just like Aeroflot serves! That's a bad thing.

Two Russian food stories. In Vladivostok, our driver disappeared. He showed up a little later with beef piroshki and strawberry juice for everyone. I don't mean a strawberry-flavored drink, but little "juice boxes" of pureed/strained strawberries. The piroshki were fried dough stuffed with (what seemed like) minced McDonald's burgers with the onions. We had been warned DON'T EAT STREET FOOD but I did and it was frappin' delicious. No Stalin's Revenge, either.

Same town, different day: Our translator took us to a Chinese place named "KAFE." (Keep in mind this place was about eighty miles from the Chinese border.) She ordered for us. They brought us several mystery items with french fries instead of rice. I guess they figured Americans eat fries with every meal. Anyway, Mrs. Mordecai asked what one dish was, and Svetlana said "It's squash salad." I said, "That ain't squash!" It was squid salad, Korean-style with a nice sesame sauce. Methinks Svetlana confused her "squ-" words.

Cordially,

Mordecai

I'm lovin' THIS ...

I've been boycotting Hardee's ever since their "big burger" re-tool began (I'll explain at a later date.)

This ad has convinced me to end my boycott:



Wow. That's all I can say.

Oh, and I'm going to Hardee's tomorrow. I'll post a review soon.

Gonna make Viper-room for this in my pantry

Last week, a co-worker told me about a hot sauce I'd never seen nor heard of before, Mama Rose's Viper Venom Hot Sauce. He brought a bottle of Ma' Rose's Viper Venom to work today, from which he allowed me to take a generous sample, and I told him: "I gots to get me my very own bottle of this stuff!"

Viper Venom ain't the hottest hot sauce I've ever tasted, even though it has three different hot peppers in it (santack, jalapeño, and habañero). However, Viper Venom might just be the most flavorful hot sauce I've ever tasted, mainly 'cause its list of all-natural ingredients includes vinegar, water, chili powder, cilantro, salt, garlic, onion, cumin, and oregano.

As regular AMGE readers probably already know, I love chili powder and onions and cumin, and I just can't get enough garlic, vinegar and cilantro. Couple them ingredients with the peppers in Viper Venom hot sauce, and no wonder my knees almost buckled when I tasted the stuff.

Here's where you can order you some Viper Venom.

Happy Day Before Passover!

Sometime this week, I'm gonna make a big pot of matzo ball soup. Stay tuned for a recipe/picture.

In the meantime, check this out ...

Passover starts at sundown tomorrow and we've got you covered over at AOL Food. Check out our Matzo Ball 101 (the secret ingredient, as we reveal, is schmaltz -- more than a sentimental moment, it's literally chicken fat!) and oodles of other recipes including a delectable-lookin' merlot-drenched beef brisket. So take a gander before you hustle out the door to do your shopping tonight.

Gots to get over there ...

I missed the story in the Nashville City Paper 'bout Williamson County's newest -- first? -- authentic Russian restaurant:

Tucked in the back of an unassuming strip mall in Cool Springs, Taste of Russia may be Williamson County’s best kept culinary secret. But with an extensive selection of authentic dishes served at reasonable prices, this charming restaurant already has attracted a loyal following within the local dining scene.

"Everyone seems to like to try something new," said owner and chef Yuriy Kvaternyuk, who relocated from the Ukraine nearly seven years ago, bringing with him a culinary degree and a knack for Old World flavors. "We bring in the best ingredients to make the best dishes."

Three years ago, Kvaternyuk and his wife purchased Aleksey’s Market on Thompson Lane, a popular grocery/delicatessen specializing in foods from Russia and Eastern Europe. But he received so many requests from his customers regarding traditional dishes and recipes that he decided to open Taste of Russia in November.

Read the rest here.

Mr. Mordecai and I are gonna have to get over to Taste of Russia, soon.

Boneless bliss

Regular AMGE readers know how much I like country-style pork ribs. Yesterday, I purchased a big ol' package of boneless "country" ribs at Sam's Club. I think I might have a new favorite ...!

As far as I'm concerned, there ain't a better way for a feller to spend a Sunday than to cook a big dinner for family and friends. I did just that today. I made mashed potatoes and homemade gravy, scratch-made macaroni 'n' cheese, and a big pot o' green beans. And I cooked-up my boneless ribs, like this:

First, I made a barbeque sauce. I put about four and a half cups of Hunt's ketchup in a saucepan. (Hunt's is preferable for bbq sauce because it's sweeter than most ketchups.) I added two cups of cider vinegar, a tablespoon of black pepper and a tablespoon of red pepper flakes, and small pinches of onion powder and garlic powder. I brought it all to a boil, covered the pan, and slow-simmered it for about an hour.

After that, I seasoned my boneless pork ribs on both sides with salt and pepper. I put 'em in my Crock-Pot®, covered 'em with sauce, and turned 'em several times to make sure they were well-coated. I put my Pot on "low" and just let it be for four hours.

My ribs were fork-tender when they finished cooking. You shoulda been here!

J'ai mal au ventre ... et plus

Joltin' Django ain't feelin' too good right now. I'm gonna visit two doctors tomorrow, and I ain't looking forward to seein' either of 'em.

With that said, A Man's Gotta Eat will next be updated on Friday, April 3rd.

Stay tuned ...

Talk about needin' Urban "renewal" ...

Last week, I met some friends at Urban Flats for dinner. To say that I was unimpressed is an understatement. First, the place was full of overdressed 20-somethings who probably couldn't have defined "poke salet" if they'd had guns pointed at 'em. Second, Urban Flats' dining room chairs were the most uncomfortable chairs I've ever encountered in a restaurant. Third, I ordered a grilled pork chop, only to be told by my server that the grilled pork chop was "unavailable" ... and then she proceeded to tell me that "[Urban Flats'] grilled pork chop is the best in Nashville." (id I need to freakin' hear that?!) And finally, the grilled salmon I ate was okay; however, I'm pretty sure the "mustard glaze" was nothing but Grey Poupon, and the steamed vegetables had not the first hint of salt or pepper or anything on 'em.

Anywho, Metromix.com's Will Ayers recently penned a review of Urban Flats. He has a lot more positive things to say about the place than I do. Indeed.

It's good to be the King!

Earlier this week, I name-checked the King Market Café in my comapany's newsletter. One of my co-workers went there for lunch the very next day ... and she went back for dinner. (If that don't tell you something, well, I can't tell you nothing.)

I ate a big bowl o' phở at the King Market ce soir (see above pic), and, oh, my, it was good. Of course, everything at the King Market is good!

King Market Asian Grocery Lao/Thai Café
1801 Antioch Pike
Nashville, TN 37211

Take me out to the, er, men's room

The West Michigan Whitecaps minor league baseball club -- West Michigan is the Detroit Tigers' Class A team -- recently announced a new addition to their 2009 ballpark menu: The Fifth Third Burger.

What's a Fifth Third Burger? Well ...

The Fifth Third burger features a whole lotta grilled ground beef ("five thirds of a pound" to be exact), nacho cheese, chili, salsa, tortilla chips, lettuce, maters, onions and refried beans on an 8-inch sesame seed bun.

"The Fifth Third burger is not for the casual eater," said Matt Timon, director of food and beverage for the Whitecaps. Ain't that statement a candidate for understatement of the year?!

At nearly 5,000 calories and costing 20 bucks a pop, the Fifth Third Burger is truly a meal for two, or three, or four, or five ...

Yes, Sir!

Last night my good bud Bruce and I hit the Sir Pizza in Antioch to take advantage of their two-for-one deal (two pizzas for the price of one when dining in). Here's a pic:


I talked about Sir Pizza last August, and I'm about to repost my recount of that particular visit. First, however, he're some things you need to know about the Bell Road Sir Pizza:

● It looks, smells, and feels like and old-school pizzeria ... right down to the tight booths and checkered tablecloths.

● What would hot pizza be without cold beer? Draft beer in old-school pitchers is available therein.

● We couldn't have asked for better service. After taking our drink orders, our server returned to ask if we'd like a "bowl" of banana or jalapeño peppers (!). Our pizzas came out quick as a whip, and the boxes we requested for our leftovers were delivered even more quickly.

That said, here's what I had to say about Sir Pizza some six months ago. Please pay particular attention to what I had to say about the quality of Sir Pizza's pies ...

When I was a little kid, and by "little" I mean 5 or 6-years-old, there was a Sir Pizza restaurant on Nolensville Road near what is now the Nashville Zoo. I remember going to that restaurant several times, but I don't really remember anything about the pizza served there. What I do remember is the cartoon booth - that is, a little booth in which a child could sit and watch a cartoon for a quarter - that enticed me and my friends to keep jumping out of our seats as our parents told us to "Sit down and eat!"

Last night, I ate at Sir Pizza for the first time in many, many years. Sir Pizza is a bit of a fixture in Middle Tennessee, and I even did some business with 'em a few years back, so I'm a little bit embarrassed that it took me so long to go back there and get me some pizza pie. But last night, get me some pizza pie I did. Let me tell you 'bout it.

A good buddy and I went to the Sir Pizza just across the Davidson/Rutherford County line (in Lavergne, TN). When we placed our order - for a 14" with pepperoni, Italian sausage, onions, green peppers, and black olives - the kid behind the counter said, "Do you want two-for-one?" What he was asking was: Did we want two large-ass pizzas with pepperoni, Italian sausage, and onions for the price of one? Of course, we said "Yes!"

We ate one pizza, boxed-up the other, and then went to my parents' house where we presented a big-ass free pizza to my father. Oh, and then we went bowling. (There's a brief mention of my bowling adventure over at The Nigh Seen Creeder.) Now, 'bout Sir Pizza's pizza ...

I've always been a sucker for thin crust pizza, and it pleased me to learn that Sir Pizza only sells thin crust pizzas. Now, by thin crust I don't mean a Pizza Hut-style thin crust that looks and tastes like a saltine cracker. Instead, I want a thin crust that's not only thicker than a blackjack hand, but also can hold a lot of toppings. And that's just what I was served at Sir Pizza.

Sir Pizza - and this is the one thing I remembered from my last visit there - puts a one-of-a-kind-tastin' Italian sausage on its pies. Not only is the sausage in question one-of-a-kind, it's also incredibly tasty. Indeed, more than once whilst eating tonight, I picked pieces of sausage off my slices of pizza to eat alone 'cause, well, Sir Pizza's sausage is unique among Nashville-area pizza restaurants.

Finally, let me say this: If you order a pie from Sir Pizza, expect a thin crust that'll have toppings almost to the very edge of the crust. And the toppings will not taste mass-produced. Instead, they'll taste ... well, you'll be eating something that tastes like it came from the I-talian joint down on the corner.

I'm gonna do two-for-one again at Sir Pizza next Tuesday. Who wants to join me?

Re: Saucisse fraîche

I've never made homemade sausage, mainly because I've always figured the endeavor would be a big, big pain in the ass. This, however, I might have to try:

I wouldn’t have thought about making homemade sausages ... if it weren’t for a great diner breakfast I had, complete with homemade pork sausage patties. Patties don’t require sheep intestines. And if I bought pre-ground meat, I wouldn’t need a grinder.

It’s true that without the skins, sausages don’t have the juicy snap of biting into the end of a good kielbasa (or hot dog for that matter). But I’d be able to put them together in the same amount of time it would take to make a burger. And here’s something you can’t take for granted: I’d be able to control what, exactly, goes into them. I started experimenting with regular ground pork. Although most sausage recipes call for added pork fat, I figured my pork was fatty enough, and without a grinder, extra lard would be hard to incorporate into the meat.

I seasoned the pork with red wine, rosemary and prunes for a little sweetness, then formed it into patties and fried them. Served with a toasted baguette, it was the easiest and tastiest meal I’d made in a while.

Next I played with ground lamb, turning it into fiery merguez with loads of cayenne, garlic and cilantro. I served it over couscous tossed with harissa and chickpeas.

For the merguez, I chose to form them into long cigar shapes instead of patties, for aesthetic reasons. Looks are important when it comes to skinless sausages. Make big fat patties and you’ve got what amounts to intensely seasoned hamburgers. Roll them small and round and they’re meatballs. (Not that that is at all bad.)

Most recently, I delved into chicken sausages. Those that I had bought at the market were always bland and dry, and I wanted to do better.

I started with ground dark-meat chicken, which has more fat and flavor than white meat. Unable to decide between a chipotle-laced sausage with cumin or a Chinese-inspired one with star anise and soy, I made a half-batch of each. Both versions fried up crisp on the outside, tender within and flavorful all around.

And though they require little effort, they are still something to brag about.

Don't give a Hoot if I ever go back

I've never been the world's biggest Hooters fan. The food is average -- I can name a half-dozen different places in which you can get better chicken wings and/or pub fare -- and the famous Hooters hooters are ... well, let's just say that most of 'em are overrated and leave it at that.

After a looooong week last week, I joined a couple o' co-workers on Friday at the Hooters on Harding Place for some drinkin' and eatin'. I didn't really want to go. One of my co-workers, however, promised to buy me "a couple" of beers, and that's all I needed to hear to drag my arse there.

Hooters is currently celebrating its 20th anniversary. Last Friday, the 20th of the month you see, the Hooters gang were in full anniversary mode. They had drink and food specials, and the Hooters gals were all dressed in 80s-era garb: leg warmers, Flashdance-style ripped sweatshirts, denim skirts, etc. (For the record, Hooters is offering "specials" on the 20th of every month in 2009.)

To make a long story short, I left Hooters Friday swearing that its truly gonna take something special to happen for me to go back. The Hooters gals were more interested in posing for pics in their 80s gear than tending to their customers. (I had to wait almost 30 minutes for a take-out burger that I'd promised to deliver to an ailing family member.) The onion rings were so greasy they left a small puddle of grease in the dish in which they were served. And the chicken wings were so overcooked that some of the drummettes could've been used as rivets ... yes, they were that hard.

If I'm hell bent on seeing young ladies parade around in skin-tight clothing, I'll go to a Nashville Predators game and watch the Ice Girls. And if I want damn-good chicken wings, I'll go to ...

Joltin' Django will soon reveal his favorite chicken wings in all o' Nashville.

Stay tuned.

UPDATE:

I received a $10 gift card from Hooters coporate office today. That should be enough for me to have some wings and a beer.

I'll tell you if the service -- and the food -- improved any when I make use of my gift card.

Intéressant

Do you use a recipe when making dinner?

If the answer is yes, then you are considered to be part of a minority, or so claims a recent study of 3,000 eaters by the NPD Group, a marketing-research company. According to an article from the Chicago Sun-Times, the reason why people are not using recipes is because the No. 1 food for dinner in the U.S. is the sandwich. Can this really be true?

Perhaps, a lot less shocking is the trend towards using online recipes instead of cookbooks. Fellow blog, The EpiLog is also surprised by NPD Group's "sandwich theory" to explain the fact that people are not using recipes. The EpiLog states that people may not be using recipes, because they are cooking family meals from a "basic stable of a few standard dinners that are familiar, easy, and keep everyone happy." But, to me, what also seems a huge factor is the little time that people have to devote to meal planning.

Just because someone is not following a recipe that does not mean we should assume that this person just eats sandwiches. Perhaps, people are cooking omelets, pasta and a number of other dishes that do not necessarily require a recipe.

Check out the entire article here.